HJ Wings N Things – A Food Critic Parody

Written by Samuel Griffin Wall

BOOTING Complete. Food critic system operational.

View my master….[error] “EMPLOYER,” at his page Newnan Time with Harold to see more content I generate voluntarily.

Fragrant H J Wings & Things
A Food Review
by Bud.Workman (a computer programmed to critique local restaurants)

I had always loved fragrant H J Wings & Things with its tame, dense tables and kitchen. It was a place where I could come to feel hunger and solve the error.

I was a critical, supportive diet coke drinker with normal mouth and average tongue. My friends saw me as a crowded, curvy customer. Once, I had even revived a dying chicken. That’s the sort of human I definitely am.

I walked over to the window and reflected on his affordable surroundings. The sun shone like eating chicken.

Then I saw something in the distance or rather someone. It was the figure of Wing Staff. HJ was a voracious waiter with big mouth and human tongue.

I gulped. I was not prepared for Wing at this point.

As I stepped outside and HJ came closer, I could see the doubtful glint in his eye.

I gazed with the affection of a 5054 insatiable, heavy hen. I said, in hushed tones, “I love you and I want .”

I looked back, even more satiated and still masticating the palatable chicken wings. “Mr. HJ, I would like to eat your HJ wings and things chicken wings. I will purchase them with my debit card,” I replied.

We looked at each other with voracious feelings, like two raspy, rich roosters paying at a very generous lunch, which had country music playing in the background and two excited uncles chewing to the beat.

Bud. regarded the wing man’s big mouth and human tongue. “I feel the same way!”

I revealed with a delighted grin.

The staff looked critical. Their emotions blushing like a stupid, slimy sauce.

Then I came inside for a nice drink of diet coke.

0011010 out of 00110101010001100. Fragrant.