written by Brandon King
The anger Lima felt as she remembered everything Santa Stark had put her through was quickly becoming too much to bare. She had put her life into her spy job and now felt like she knew nothing about the REAL WORLD or her parents or Tone Loc or Craig or her sibling or Alan Jackson. Every moment that passed she got further from herself and closer to madness. It was too much. Lima kept whispering that to herself. “It’s too much…” Was she really on her way to kill Tony Stark, the Jolly Saint Nick, our Messiah?
But then Lima was struck with a different question: would she ONLY kill Tony Stark Claus? Or could she do something more to finally stop the madness.
She pictured herself back in Nashville. An acoustic guitar. An empty bed. CMT playing in the background. The few times her phone wasn’t blowing up with calls from the spy agency. At the time she hated those moment, but now it was the only place she wanted to be.
Lima wasn’t even noticing how much pressure she put on the gas pedal. She didn’t even know where she was driving. Something deeper and darker was now guiding her. Freedom was on the gas pedal. Lima was just behind the wheel.
“Slow down Lima. Tony’s Summer Grove residence is just on the left up here.”
She heard it again. Being told what to do. “Slow Down”? Who does Tone Loc think he is. Who does he think he’s talking to. She was Lima F*CKING Lee.
The pedal was now touching the floor. Tone Loc help tight to the seatbelt. He didn’t even bother saying anything. He knew what was coming even before Lima took the sharp turn into the Summer Grove sign and the bricks crushed him to death.
Lima shoved a brick off her shoulder and onto the pile of them that laid on top of Tone. Passerby’s began to slow down and attend to the scene. All asking the same. “Are you OK?”
Lima had never been more OK as she slid a pair of pistols into the waist of her jeans, still warm with Tone’s blood. Lima began to walk towards Tony Stark’s house. An Iron Man inflatable wearing a Santa hat donned the front yard. What a narcissist.
“Ma’am are you ok?! We just called the cops!” called out a wave of voices behind her. Lima wasn’t afraid of no cops. The only thing that could possibly stop Lima–
“Bean, stop…”
was the voice of Craig.
Craig made his way to Lima, still bruised and beaten from their last encounter, where Lima felt betrayed by Craig’s tactic. But the more she thought about it, the way Craig tried to calm her down, the more she realized he was just doing what he thought was best for her. She could see it now.
BLAM! BLAM!
Two bullets and Craig exploded into pieces.
Lima knew the exact self-destruction spot that Craig had surgically added to his body after breaking too many rules in the spy agency.
She appreciated that Craig wanted to take care of her. But that was the old Lima. The old Lima just listened and listened and listened. No more listening. Lima kicked open the door to Tony’s house, just as he was recording a video for Make A Wish Foundation promising eternal life and eternal gifts.
Both pistols found their way into the holly holy jolly path of Tony Stark’s gaze.
“What do you want your gravestone to read? Tony? Messiah? Santa?”
“Why not… dad?”
Lima froze. The pistols still stuck on Tony, but with no power for Lima to squeeze.
Tony Stark dug his fingers under his chin and pulled the skin back, dropping the face of Tony Stark on the ground and revealing Lima’s own father.
“I’ve been watching you. When you’re sleeping. When you’re awake. I know that you’ve been bad not good, Lima.”
Lima was running every scenario in her head about why her father would be both Tony Stark and Santa Claus. Oh, and the Messiah.
“The day you and your Uber driver almost killed me? I was there watching you. But I guess I got just a little bit too close… stupid me. But Lima, I had to. I had to keep an eye on you. You’re my Lima Bean. My baby girl. My super trooper love bug. I couldn’t leave you alone out there in the big scary world. All for the chance at a Spy Badge and a Platinum Album? You can be so much more. I knew it. That’s why I became Santa, to inspire you with gifts. That’s why I became the Messiah, to forgive you. And that’s why I became Tony Stark, because I know he’s your favorite actor. I did all this for YOU, Lima.”
His words were touching. He loved her. He wasn’t asking anything OF Lima, but just expressing love FOR Lima.
“And Lima… there’s one more person I’d like you to meet. So you truly know how much I love you.”
Her father turned his back and picked up a guitar that Tony/Messiah/Dad/Santa had in the corner and he began to strum. That’s when Lima heard it. The song. The song that got her into this. The song that inspired her enough to be stupid enough.
“Way down yonder on the Chattahoochee…”
BLAM! BLAM!
Chapter 12, the final Chapter, coming soon
Newnan Time with Harold 